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  • AutoAnything - 12 Steps to Ford Probe Recovery

    12 Steps to Ford Probe Recovery

    In response to the near pandemic rash of Ford Probe addiction sweeping the nation, authorities are seeking ways to stop the wave. Sadly, clinical tests continue to prove that kicking a Ford Probe addiction is next to impossible. In fact, most Ford Probe addicts have zero intention of quitting their prized Probe. And, as one recovering Probe addict puts it, “You never quite get the Probe outta ya.”

    Fortunately, a clinic in California has released an unorthodox approach to recovery. Rather than denying sufferers their Ford fix, this 12-step program immerses the addicts in a regimen of Ford Probe customization. The theory is that upon full completion of their Ford Probe project, all compulsion to tinker with their Probe ceases. Below is an excerpt from the clinic’s manual, 12 Steps to Ford Probe Recovery.

    Step One - Admission:
    Admit that you’re powerless over—and cannot control—your Ford Probe addiction.

    Step Two - Relax:
    Install one of those Ford Probe Air Intake Systems; when your Probe is breathing easy, so are you.

    Step Three - Take Control:
    A brand new set of Ford Probe Brakes & Brake Pads or just some performance Ford Probe Brake Pads give you the control your life needs right now.

    Step Four - Cover Your Assets:
    Ford Probe Car Covers keep jilted loved-ones from marring the object that took you from them.

    Step Five - Take Inventory:
    With Ford Probe Cargo & Trunk Liners, you can take inventory, and anything else you’re hauling, anywhere without fear of interior damage.

    Step Six - You Can’t Do it Alone:
    Enlist the help of an array of Ford Probe Travel Accessories. This opens you up to the concept of seeking assistance.

    Step Seven - Improve Your Outlook:
    There’s nothing quite like a set of new Ford Probe Wiper Blades to deliver a whole new perspective.

    Step Eight - Change Your Tune:
    The deep rumble from a tuned combination of Ford Probe Exhaust, Mufflers & Tips lets everyone know you really have changed.

    Step Nine - Clean Up Your Act:
    Ford Probe Catalytic Converters keep you within the boundaries of the law; which is important now.

    Step Ten - Get Healthy:
    High-performance Ford Probe Oil Filters keep your engine’s lifeblood clean and healthy.

    Step Eleven - Seek Internal Change:
    Nothing spruces up the old insides like a set of custom Ford Probe Seat Covers.

    Step Twelve - Release Excess Baggage:
    With Ford Probe Trailer Hitches & Towing Accessories, you can put all the baggage in the trailer.

    If you suffer from Ford Probe Addiction, we encourage you to do what’s best for you and your family—seek help immediately. Whether you quit cold turkey or follow a recovery plan like the one outlined above, the help you need to rid yourself of this obsession is out there.

    In an unrelated story, the California clinic responsible for authoring and publishing the manual, 12 Steps to Ford Probe Recovery, has been exposed by authorities as a Ford Probe tuner shop, specializing in the customization and preservation of Ford Probes.
    ProbeTalk is BACK! Once again, it's what you use the Internet for!

    For now, please use forums.probetalk.com to access the message board. I still have some work to do with getting the main page to work with vB and the subdomain.
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